Running from AARP


It is indeed discouraging to encounter in one’s mailbox, quite suddenly and surprisingly, a certain dispatch from a certain organization informing one that, upon reaching a certain age this summer, one is entitled to discount car insurance, life insurance and other frivolities and special offers. Yes, friends, i received my first letter from AARP (American Association of Retired Persons) last week.  HOW DID THIS HAPPEN?

How can i be 50 when i still believe in fairies and work diligently to provide hiding places for them in my flower beds? How can i be 50 when a talking action figure of the pirate Jack Sparrow (CAPTAIN Jack Sparrow) adorns my desk and supplies me with much needed information for my business? “Looks like rough seas ahead, mate.” He informs me when a show cancels with one week’s notice. And I could not manage day to day without his prophetic words of advice,”If it’s not squalls, it’s reefs. If it’s not reefs it’s an incompetent at the helm.” Midday lunch breaks often consist of finishing yesterday’s coloring book project and watching Mr Rogers. How can i be 50 when my “board room” is a wooden swing hanging from a tree in the front yard?  How can I be 50 when I still think pizza and french fries are food groups? (well ok that’s a stretch but darn i do love them…..) How can i be 50 when my favorite shirts are adorned with dragons, fairies and the Sesame Street logo and I went to my house refinance last month in a Snoopy t shirt and jeans. HOW DID THIS HAPPEN?

Will I learn to shop on Tuesdays to qualify for the over fifty ten percent discount at Kroger? Can tweny-five cent coffee and the seniors menu be far off? Wait. Those two things may not be so bad. I actually have often found myself wondering, in a restaurant (when i go to such places) if I could order from the kids menu because adult servings are just too much food. And the names of everything on the kids menu is a lot more cheerful. “Yes, I’d like to order Fabulous Fairy Fries and a Magical Garden Salad with Berry Blast dressing.”That’s a lot more fun than an adult fries and a salad.   Seniors are probably entitled to all sorts of travel and restaurant perks and there are probably discounts galore out there. I adore coupons and half off offers so perhaps, just maybe, maybe this may work out for me. I have heard fifty is the new thirty, that gray is in vogue and being older simply means being wiser in all ways. Hunched over and wrinkly but wiser.

I’ll have to contemplate this more as my “special day” approaches. But right now I have to finish a Pirates of the Caribbean coloring book project and after that I’m reading THE PLACES YOU’LL GO by Dr Suess. The Places You’ll Go was the last book Dr Suess wrote. The ending line goes like this:  “You’re off to great places. Today is your day.  Your mountain is waiting. So …get on your way!” Ted Gessel (Dr Suess) wrote books for fifty three years (longer than I have been alive) and passed away when he was 87. So maybe fifty won’t be so bad and will be filled new experiences and exciting things to do and discover. Enchantment can come at any age. Especially when you’re fifty going on fifteen…..

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